Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize