Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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