I cannot find my penis.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
What happened to fro yo and sex?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
