Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
