I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
She said her name was "party"
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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