I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
