Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize