never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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