What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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