so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
