$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
