Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
