Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
