Banned from zoo.
Again?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize