I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
