Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
