I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
