Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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