your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize