i permit you to call me
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize