You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize