Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Oh god it's open bar.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
