just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
