Someone shit on the floor
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
