absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
