oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
