In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
