SEEEEXXX PLEASE
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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