I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
