oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
