I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize