i need an iv and a liver transplant
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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