benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
