Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
