ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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