Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
