if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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