Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
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