i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Randomize