goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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