I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
