how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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