YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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