69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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