I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
This toilet bowl is my home.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
