Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
