I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
