Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
