it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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