I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
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