drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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