4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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